Life Skills – Self

Simple, not necessarily easy.

Do you know where your Self ends and someone else’s begins? If you're not sure, you're not alone, and you're in the right place.

It Starts with Readiness

Before any growth work begins, we start with an honest check-in. Are you ready for this journey right now? Not where you think you should be but where you actually are. That's your Stop Light: Red, Yellow, Green, or Blue. No judgment. Just honesty. Because starting from the wrong place wastes your time, your energy, and your hope.

Then We Choose a Vehicle

How are you moving through life right now, from sloth to cheetah or somewhere in between?

• Are you having a chaos ride, where everyone else is driving and you're just barely hanging on?
• Is life confusing, baffling, and unclear? Nothing makes sense and the rules keep changing?
• Are you on a partially guided tour of life where sometimes things seem to stabilize and are clear, but then you suddenly feel lost and alone?
• Perhaps your life adventures are still challenging, but softer, more intentional, and maybe even fun?

Your vehicles during life change as you grow. But if you are trying to get somewhere and someone else seems to be at your vehicle's controls and it seems like you are not only on their journey but no one is stopping to get directions.

Then Let's Walk the Stones In Order

The 7 Dimensions of Wellness aren't random. They're sequenced because growth has a series of clear pathways, formed by building skills.

When we first start walking we fall a lot, but we keep getting up again and again until we master walking.

Each dimension begins easy, most skills we learned a long time ago. But, if we didn't and we try to jump ahead and skip the base levels of skills then it's like trying to drive on a road that hasn't been finished and we tend to fall into holes.

When learning to walk we don't know yet that we can run, then we learn to run but can't yet jump. Each new thing we need to learn is invisible to us where we currently are in our Growth journey.

It's true for everyone, we all start at the same blank slate place when we begin life.

We don't know yet the many things that will be coming. What if we all stopped learning once we learned to walk?

We are supposed to be supported by the people around us in our youth, those responsible for helping teach us all the many things we don't know yet.

If those people missed something, or worse, in some way sabotaged our ability to know what we should know, we get stuck, stalled, we become paralyzed and don't even realize we have something important missing.

Hopefully, one day, we start to recognize the possibilities of a hole inside of us. That perhaps we are missing an important skill set.

Please join me on this journey. When I began it all seemed so overwhelming. But ONE! Just ONE thing at a time is all we can do.

We can move forward together, like sitting side by side in a theme park ride. Sometimes we scream and shout and sometimes we may want to cry.

I guarantee that doing this forward movement one stone at a time, building a new pathway in life, is not only obtainable, but at times might even be enjoyable.

This forward motion isn't a race. It's a journey and it can be wonderful. A labyrinth is a pathway with one way to the center and one way out. When we emerge we are changed, grown in the best possible way; naturally, simply, clearly, and most of all, intentionally.

These seven areas offer a practical roadmap for self-awareness, self-care, and skillful living, notice where you might want to journey to, just one step stone at a time.

Tips for emotional wellbeing:

• Tune in to your thoughts and feelings
• Cultivate an optimistic attitude
• Learn and practice time management
• Use stress relief tools that actually work for you
• Accept and forgive yourself regularly
• Notice the stories you tell yourself on repeat; are they yours or someone else's?
• Practice separating your self-worth from your circumstances

An intellectually and spiritually well person seeks growth, understanding, and harmony within themselves and with the world around them.

Ideas for nourishing your intellectual and spiritual life:

• Stay curious, ask big questions and pursue new learning
• Explore your spiritual core, whatever that means for you
• Challenge your mind with new ideas, skills, courses, or creative hobbies
• Practice a new language, instrument, or art form,  just for the joy of it
• Spend time in stillness, meditation or prayer
• Read, create, take a class or join a group to engage in meaningful growth activities
• Listen with your heart; live by your values
• Allow yourself time and clear space to think freely and be fully yourself
• Find meaning and growth in life's challenges

A socially well person nurtures healthy, meaningful relationships and contributes to their community.

Ideas for nourishing your social life:

• Cultivate relationships that energize rather than drain you
• Set healthy boundaries with love and clarity
• Show up authentically, let people know the real you
• Listen deeply and communicate with intention
• Build a support network you can lean on and contribute to
• Engage with your community,  volunteer, connect, collaborate
• Make time for play and laughter with people you trust
• Recognize when relationships need tending, mending, or releasing

A financially well person understands their relationship with all aspects of money and makes intentional choices that support their present needs and future goals.

Ideas for nourishing your financial life:

• Get honest about where you are, awareness is the first step
• Build small, consistent activities, skills and habits that grow over time
• Create a spending plan that reflects your values, not just your bills
• Talk openly about money with the people it affects
• Identify the patterns and stories you inherited about money
• Learn something new, investing, budgeting, tax planning, business finances
• Ask for help from professionals when you need it
• Celebrate financial wins, even the small ones
• Separate your self-worth from your net worth

Suggestions for thriving in your work life:

• Explore a variety of career paths
• Create a personal vision for your future
• Choose work that matches your talents and values
• Stay flexible—keep learning and adapting

Follow in the footsteps of children!