Try = Do

I have a creative idea, I try, it’s not working. They say, “give up,” “it’s not working,” “quit,” “stop.” 
I feel sad, hurt, and so I quit.
Can you remember? 
How many times was this said to you?
Most importantly, are you still saying it to yourself?

I have a life-long pattern of difficulty in completing things. But I want to change that. I need to find out whose voice from my past was the loudest? Who kept telling me I can’t, shouldn’t, don’t, not?

What am I telling myself? Can I hear, or find my own voice inside my head?

I asked a dear friend recently, “who is talking to you?” I had her visualize a table and who was at the head of the table. At one end her brother, at the other end her father. Her mother and sister were there too. But, she was not even in the room. Her own voice was not at the table. The male voices at the two ends of the table were drowning her in messages that she was not able to be in charge of her own life, without a man running things.

Who sits at your table? The only person that needs to be in the room is us. Our voice should be the loudest, clearest. My friend did a great job of getting the visual, she started by putting most of her family at the kid table. I prefer to put some people completely out of the room, but her creativity helped get her unstuck.

I have always had very huge visions in my head. I am a dreamer. My mind does not stop building, floating, seeing the possibilities all the way to the grandest, biggest, sometimes strangest possibility imaginable. As a dreamer it feels many days like I have not accomplished my dreams. It’s only recently I have fully realized that I have a unique skill set. My gifts ARE my big dreams. I don’t see numbers or words in my head. I am not good with spatial orientation or directions. But, when I am surrounded by good, supportive people, who understand the value of my dreams, my worth becomes apparent.

I am invited to places because of my peacemaking, negotiating, creative solution skills. My skills don’t fit into a nice neat box. People don’t understand me, at least at first usually. I do make people uncomfortable. Why? Because I’m a dreamer. Because I don’t, ‘fit in.” Because I will invite people on their own journey. Ask them to dream big. Adventure to new places. Or take the next, uncomfortable step in their life. To do what is most uncomfortable first so they can get unstuck. What is the next step on our own personal journey?

This morning I changed my own mind about trying. Trying = doing. Experimenting = success on my learning journey. I completely believe we are life-long learners, but how can we learn if we do not try? So what will you try today?

The tree, the tree, the big, big tree!

Do you see the giant tree?

Not that one, the big one!

No, tilt your head all the way back and strain to see the top of the giant tree.

The stump as big as car

That branch as big as a bus

See the 3? Those are sister trees. 

These giant trees, they oversee,

1, 2, 3 lifetimes they see.

Hundreds of years they canopy.

Not people or pest,

not lighting, nor fire,

the strength of Big Trees is magic to guests.