Skill – Cross Country Move

Packed, moved, unpacked, and started a new life. It’s been just over a year since our family made a complete move from San Diego to Baltimore. Yes, it’s been a total life overhaul. There were many, many tears shed in the preparation. My son and I took the cross-country drive with the dog after Dad went and started a new job and then found a place for us to live.

Any move is a challenge but when you move from Southern CA to just about anywhere else (except Hawaii) it’s not inspiring. I took my time driving us across country as if taking it slowly might make the outcome better. The last leg of the journey I could not stop crying. I finally put on a self-hypnosis Youtube and relaxed. Since we arrived at night we went straight to sleep.

The next morning was one of those life-changing moments for me. I walked into the bathroom, looked in the mirror and turned on my first complaint. I stopped myself and thought, this is going to be a REALLY long and painful journey if I turn on complaining. So right then I made myself a promise.

NO COMPLAINING!

I allow myself to state any real truth, observations, and even agree with people who do the complaining for me. However, I have managed to do more than just survive in my new environment, I believe I am pretty close to thriving. It depends on the day/moment. I still have very real waves of loneliness, sadness, and at times I can feel the finger of depression trying to tap me on the shoulder and get me to turn around.

But, I made a promise to me and my family. I am stronger than the darkness that might try to consume me. I make sure that my focus, thoughts, activities all align with my positive policies. Don’t get me wrong, this is not about being fake positive. I am on a constant quest for what works best for me and my family, especially when we are facing winter.

I realized that I need to travel regularly, so I do. I reach out to friends and family on an almost daily basis. My list of fun winter activities really helped give me numerous things to look forward to. We keep trying new things, turning our time toward those things that make us most happy. A little at a time we have met new people, established some new habits, but most of all we make sure to call each other out when emotions start to head to the bad place.

In the end, there have been many benefits to moving. I am still getting rid of so much stuff. There was such a massive amount of stuff collected after living in the same house for 20+ years. Friends have changed, I have changed for the better. The learning opportunities are continuous. Staying really, really focused on what is happening right now and letting the past take a back seat to the present has really been the most helpful thing along with my No Complaint policy. If you need to take the cross country journey please know that you are not alone.

5 Ways Moving Can Benefit Your Mental Health